Not sensible at all, falling in love with a dog. But I’ve discovered a secret.
First, let me talk about Scooby. And his best friend, my nephew. T didn’t grow up with a dog, but he’d wanted one desperately during his childhood. So after college, when he began his first job in a new city living in a tiny rental with three other guys, T followed his sentimental dream – he rescued a dog.
Scooby came from a run-down shelter with no pedigree and was a bit of a handful at first.
What are stairs? What’s it mean to “pee” here, and not there? Why isn’t a couch a perfect napping spot?
Through it all T patiently taught and trained this goofy brown-eyed mid-sized sensation of a being.
They became inseparable. T walked Scooby on the city streets early in the morning, then raced home at lunch time for a quick outing, and after work the two of them bounded into the city park, releasing pent-up energy.
Scooby endeared himself to T’s roomies, and then to T’s new love interest. In fact, Scooby probably helped T on the romantic front. Who can’t love a guy who loves a bright-eyed, crooked-smiled dog?
In the meantime, T’s older brother, C, once disdainful of slowing down to include an animal in the mix of work and play, found himself searching a shelter in another part of the country with his new wife. In some mysterious way, C’s heart expanded, reminding me of the Grinch at the end of the story when his heart expands while singing with the Whovilles. My nephew C fell in love with a tiny, silky-haired white dog, breed indeterminate and rather challenged on the looks department.
C and his wife named the dog, who flinches at the sound of a door closing or the approach of any man but C – Wolfie. Of course.
A week ago, Scooby suddenly and unexpectedly passed away. He was strong and healthy with an underlying unknown condition. I cried when T texted: “Scooby will always be with me. He’s my best friend.”
And that’s when the secret hit me. Men are brought up to be unemotional, unsentimental, and unmoved by the vagaries of life.
I know that the men in my life have discovered deep wells of strong pure unabashed love for four-legged beings who give everything …. to be a best friend.
Thank you Scooby. And Wolfie, Henry, Brixton, Charlie, and Tory; thank you Oliver, Jax, Callie, April, Hubie, and Jamie, and to all the best friends in our lives.
Dog Love exemplifies the best of the human spirit.
How beautiful. I am so sorry that your nephew lost his friend… they matter so much.
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No one, and nothing, replaces an animal-best-friend in our lives.
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I agree. Their absence leaves such a hole inour lives.
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❤ But also, perhaps, makes the heart larger. xo
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Oh yes, I agree with you there too. ❤
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A very touching story. I think it’s true that many men are raised with the notion that we need to be tough, as if crying or showing our emotions somehow makes us less tough. Mom was the nurturing parent in my family. My dad was a very good man, but part of his German upbringing was to not express a lot of emotions. I wanted his hugs/affection, but that was hard for him. I did eventually wear him down after I became an adult, and it became easier for him. After a visit, I would always hug him and tell him that I loved him.
I don’t cry often, but I’m not ashamed when I do. I do love my dogs though, and I dread that day when it will be time to put them down. There’s going to be plenty of tears because they’re my buddies.
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I think a lot of European and British people have that “stiff upper lip” approach to relationships, Pete. My mom is not very demonstrative and never hugged and kissed us. She doesn’t really approve of the fact that I hug and kiss my boys (or did – teenagers are a bit less enthusiastic on that front), but she never says anything.
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I go to extra lengths to hug all of my young grandsons. I’m getting them comfortable with hugs and “I love you’s” from the very start! 🙂 And luckily, all of my grandkids have a dog in their lives. These children will receive their first lesson about losing a being who means the world to them. “If you don’t love, you never learn about deep loss. But oh, how the love is worth it.”
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So that’s what it’s about. Beautiful.
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Exactly. Love is what it’s all about. ❤
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Scooby love.
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Ohh Pam, hugs for your nephew. Yes, to all you have said. ❤ ❤ ❤
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The pain of losing a best friend NEVER goes away. Ever. But the love stays in the heart forever too.
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Yes, Pam. God bless your Henry. ❤️❤️❤️
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Here’s to the dogs who rescue people’s hearts, may they always remain in their hearts. Beautiful post-
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I believe that deep love like the kind we experience with a best-friend-animal helps the heart grow bigger and stronger. Forever.
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Beautiful tribute to sweet Scooby, Pam. He couldn’t have ended up with a more loving family. I’m sorry. ❤
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Scooby had an amazing (too young) life, thanks to T. They appreciated each other whole-HEART-edly.
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Lovely post, Pam. I’m so sorry for your nephew’s loss.
We had a very special dog when I was a child that my mom still talks about.
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I understand your mom’s memory lasting an entire lifetime. That’s how I am about my dogs from childhood (Streak, Suzy) and as an adult (Tory, Henry). They are gone but never ever forgotten.
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I love this post even though it makes me cry.
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Truth? I cried buckets as I wrote this post. xo
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Tears in my eyes. The saying can also go about cats. God help me I know the pain of loosing one of our babies, who has brought so much joy and love into our lives. What a beautiful tribute to Scooby! We have so much to learn as human beings from animals.
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Pets – whether feline or canine or equine – teach us about love that doesn’t have a name to it. It just IS.
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There are many Scoobies in this world!!! We had a Misty girl for 12 years. She meant the world to my husband and me. Dogs know just what to do and “say” when we need it the most. Touching tribute to a dog and his “man”!!
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I know, Karen. Misty is in your heart forever. She was a great friend. xo
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I love my cat.
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And your cat loves YOU! To our pets. xo
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Pam, your nephew’s gentle chuckle at the end of the video clip sums up your post … the warmth, joy and tenderness that man’s best friend brings out … especially in men! Scooby looked adorable and what a dreadful shock and sadness for you all and particularly T. hugs all around ❤️
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T was so sweet (and brave) to send me this video of Scooby hugging him in the most incredible way. Pure love exemplified. xo
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It is natural for people to be upset when a pet they love dies or is ill or injured. My mother is quite restrained with her emotions as that is her strict, Victorian upbringing. I think this is gradually changing.
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My parents were from the ‘don’t show affection’ generation also, Robbie. My mom didn’t start hugging me until I was in my 40s! But you know what? She hugged our dog all the time. 🙂
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Beautiful post Pam. Moved.
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Thank you. Our pets move us in ways unimaginable at times.
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My heart goes out to your nephew. I honestly had never felt such deep grief until I lost mine (10 years ago). I sometimes want to kick myself for getting another, because my heart is going to break again one day. It feels like a piece of you is missing, so I hope your nephew has good support while he grieves. They leave paw prints on our hearts. Sending comforting thoughts his way.
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I know, Lori. When our first family dog died, my husband, in tears, claimed, “We will never get a dog again!” And then we did, a year later, and had an amazing time with Henry for 12 1/2 years. We still miss him horribly, five years later…. But the love is worth it, isn’t it?
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For sure, the love is worth it. ❤
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Beautiful post, Pam. Condolences to your nephew. I’ve been there several times, and it never gets easier.
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Never gets easier. In fact, sometimes I think each loss gets harder. But goodness gracious, the love pets give us is just too astounding to give it up.
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Touching … And on this Thanksgiving holiday weekend, I am thankful for the pets who have been in my life and to those who find boundless love and joy in pets.
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PS: Losing pets is so difficult … Comfort to all owners. …. and I hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving.
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Our Thanksgiving was wonderful and included three dogs from two different families: a golden, a basset hound, and a standard poodle. They were all well-behaved until a dog bone “disagreement.” 🙂 But they settled it quickly and all was love and hugs. Thanks be to our dogs!
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Great story and tribute to all the dogs, cats, pets, and relationships touched by love. Sorry about your nephew’s loss. heart hugs.
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Takes a while for the heart to heal after the loss of a dog. But the wound heals faster when we are thankful for all a pet brings to us. Thanks so much, Brad.
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Great attitude Pam.
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So beautiful and sad! I lost my Golden beauty, Toby, some years ago…my best pal! He is still so missed!
Sorry about Scooby… Loved the show of love…
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Here’s to your wonderful Toby. I bet our Tory (gone many years also, and a Golden) would have gotten along well with your best friend.
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I don’t know why, but I didn’t see the death of Scooby coming. It hit me right between the eyes and bounced into my heart. I love all the men in my life, especially the old one – ha!
(I’m sorry for the loss. . . !)
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I needed to slowly work up to Scooby’s death because it hurt us all so much (even though Scooby lived many states away). Every time we talked to T he had a “Scooby” story, so the sweet dog lodged a place in all of our hearts.
Here’s to all the pets…and men… in our lives, Marian. 🙂
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Exactly true. What’s not to love?!
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That they leave us too soon, these best friends…. ❤
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Well, yes, there’s that…. We have a very old deaf dog that is on her last legs just now. How long do we let her hang in there? It’s a tough one.
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Oh Anneli. I know what you’re talking about. The decision between wanting to keep your dog with you forever, but not wanting the animal to suffer – from not only the pain, but from the indignities of not being able to ‘be a dog.” Sending loving thoughts your way.
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A perfect post for this holiday. I am sorry that your nephew last his pup but I love how dogs help people grow and mature.
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Our pets teach us so much!
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Yes they do!
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Your posts nearly always take us all into that place in someone’s heart, this time your nephew. Poor Scooby. There is a video that’s going around right now of a solider who was gone for two years, and at first her dog didn’t recognize her… until he did. Also quite moving. – Marty
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Oh! The way a dog greets us when we’ve been gone (whether an hour or two years…). Nothing like it.
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Oh dear, how sad. At least Scooby didn’t suffer but that doesn’t diminish the huge hole in your nephew’s heart. The big tough fellows in my family completely fall apart when a pet passes away. xo
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I think seeing our “big tough fellows” fall apart at the loss of a pet endears us to them that much more. ❤
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Exactly!
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Beautiful, Pam. That’s love. Unconditional love. I especially had to smile when I saw the short clip of Scooby and your nephew. Maya does exactly the same thing with Mark! Those two make each other incredibly happy. Of course, she and I love each other as well, but the bonding she has with Mark (without any apparent reason) is extremely special and devoted.
Dedicating Thanksgiving to dogs, our best friends, is awesome. I am very sorry for T. Losing a beloved dog that is such a big part of the family is tough.
Is that your dog in the banner?
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I was hoping you’d see this post, Liesbet. I’ve had so much fun reading how you and Mark have fallen deeply in love with Maya. And she with you both, of course. Yes, our beloved Henry is on the blog’s banner. He’s been gone for five years, but never, ever forgotten. ❤
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My heart aches for your nephew and the rest of the family that will miss Scooby. I think dogs teach men how to expand their hearts better than anyone or anything. I’ve been without a dog for 8 years now and still miss her every day. But we had dog guests yesterday. 😉 Fuzzy love is special.
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Dog guests are always welcome! We were at our daughter’s house for Thanksgiving with our granddog (their Charlie) and two other dog guests – a Basset hound and a standard poodle. They certainly added to the festivities. “Fuzzy love” – great expression.
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I loved the video too. Forgot to mention it.
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Love and prayers…
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Thanks Bette. I hope my nephew feels all the love and understanding that is sent his way. xo
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It is no small thing to lose our beloved pets.
Peace and healing in the days ahead.
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Talk about a hole in the heart! We still have a large hole for our Henry and it’s been five years. Thanks for sending the peace and blog hug – I think T feels it all.
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A lovey story here. I am saddened that your nephew lost his beloved companion but at the same time it makes my heart glad to know that he knew the love a a beautiful dog- no matter if his dog was of dubious genetics and was a pound pupply. Those pound pups are often the very best dogs because they know they were saved and loved. I can attest for that.
At some point, I hope your nephew and any other kin will honor the memory of their departed dog and get another dog- preferably from a high kill shelter. A life/lives will be saved and there will be an abundance of gratitude. Dogs know. They really do know when they have been saved.
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I agree wholeheartedly. Thanks so much for your comment and the doggy love sent over the blogsphere.
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Oh so hard to say goodbye to these wonderful pals.
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Feels like the heart is ripped out, doesn’t it? Sigh. But oh, all that LOVE!
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Most dogs are such loyal and loving creatures that it’s hard not to become attached. Scooby sounds like a wonderful (but unfotunately short-lived) addition to your nephew’s life and brought out the best in him.The wonderful thing about a dog is the fact that you can remove your ‘mask,’ so to speak, and be yourself. It’s no wonder these magnificent animals have become a staple for therapy pets for those who suffer from anxiety disorders and PTSD, among other things. I hope T finds another Scooby.
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An excellent point, Mark. We don’t wear masks around our pets – they know us through and through, and still love us despite our flaws.
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Hi, Pam – This is a beautiful tribute to Scooby. It is so true — “Men are brought up to be unemotional, unsentimental….until a dog enters their hearts.” The first time that I ever saw my husband cry, was when we lost our first dog (and his loyal companion), Wilson.
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Same here, Donna. First time my guy sobbed was when our first Golden died. At that point he said, “we will never get a dog again!” One year later….we got our puppy Henry. 🙂 Here’s to Wilson and Scooby and all the loyal companions who added so much to our lives.
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What beautiful memories. Me too, about all of it. My dog is irreplaceable.
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That’s the problem, isn’t it? Our pets are totally irreplaceable. I always laugh at people who say animals don’t have personalities. Oh, how much they miss by not getting to “know” a pet.
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Beautifully written. It’s so true that animal hold a very special place in our hearts. They allow to be and accept us for who we are. Sorry for your nephews loss
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Something special in a dog’s heart – we can certainly learn from them about unconditional love. ❤
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What a lovely tribute, and so well-stated. Dogs, I think, open many hearts to healing and sentiment. Thanks, Pam!
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I think you’re right, Cindy!
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Aw, dogs can change the lives of men. This is a lovely tribute to both. May your nephew find another dog to love.
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I think that should be a quote spread ’round the world. “Dogs can change the lives of men.” So TRUE!
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You made me cry Pam, I can’t bear it when it’s time to say goodbye to our animal companions. Condolences on the loss of Scooby but I’m very glad he and your nephew got to be best friends..
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Sorry for making you cry with my Scooby story, Andrea. True confession: every time I re-read my post, I cry too. It’s hard to open wounds that never heal when we lose a beloved pet. But on the other hand, every day I say thank you to our Henry (gone 5 years) for the love he shared with us. Weird? Maybe. But I still feel his presence, and that may be even weirder. But comforting.
MANY THANKS for sharing my MOLLY FINDS HER PURR book on your post. I’m beyond happy that you love Molly and her purring story.
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Not weird at all 🙂
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xo
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What a beautiful post, Pam, even if it did make me cry. The unconditional love a dog gives is such an incredible thing.
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There are so many everyday miracles in life that we take for granted. The love of a dog may be top on that list. Thank you, Mary. xo
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What a touching post! And it speaks to a truth that all of us who have shared our homes with dogs know: dogs to touch our hearts, deeply and it ways that we never thought possible. I’m so sorry about Scooby, but glad that your nephew adopted him. As much as it hurts to lose them, the love that dogs give us, and the ways they teach us to open our hearts, is worth the grief. I hope that when he is ready, your nephew will open his heart and home to another dog, but of course that is his personal choice. Thanks again for posting this…..
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I agree, Ann. Despite the intense pain when a dog dies, the love he shared with us leaves lasting impacts. My nephew had adopted another dog while Scooby was still alive, and Brixton is helping T heal.
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Beautiful story and great pictures! I wrote last week an article on my website titled: “The Art of Living from a Dog’s perspective” – https://authorjoannereed.net/the-art-of-living-from-a-dogs-perspective/. Feel free to check it out!
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You wrote a beautiful post about a Dog’s Perspective, Joanne. I tried to comment on your post but wasn’t able to. Many thanks for sharing here.
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Thanks for stopping by and for trying to leave a comment. It is very strange that you were not able to do so. Will have to look into it.
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Awww, Pam. So sweet and sentimental. I think you’re right about men and dogs. I’ve seen that in my family too as the tough men become mushy lumps of love with their dogs. Dogs have a way of drawing out the best in us and teaching us the meaning of unconditional love. ❤
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I’m not sure our men understand how much we love them even more when they become “mushy lumps of love” with their dogs. But it’s so true! xo
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Condolences, Pam. So difficult. He was a gift.
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Excellent way of putting it, Carla. Scooby was a GIFT, and one that keeps on giving, even though he’s gone. ❤
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I was a basket case when I lost my Brandy, my Muffin, my Bear and when I lose my Jegs. How humans continue to live when our 4 legged furbabies cross over is beyond me.
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We humans keep on going because our pets show us how love keeps on living …. forever. To our furry animals and all they give to us! ❤
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Here here! *clink*
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such a bittersweet post – our pets can be our mirrors, bringing out the best in us…
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I’ve been thinking of this “mirror” philosophy a lot, da-AL and I’m glad that you mention it here. Dogs who are ignored by the humans they live with, and dogs not appreciated by their humans, seem despondent and don’t become “alive” as much as dogs who are well loved. I think “mirror” is a good term here – dogs mirror their human’s love, and the humans who are willing to mirror their dogs shine forth in love.
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I notice in terms of my dear 2 doggies that passed away last year at ages 14.5 – aside from bodily aging, their personalities became more & more attuned with pleasing me…
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What a lovely story. I never understood the fascination about dogs by people in the West, until I fell in love with one of my parents’ dogs two years ago. I was shattered when the dog died.
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I’m sorry for your loss, but your mourning also proves your love for these four-legged beings. ❤
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Pam, Your dog ‘thoughts’ made me smile. I cannot imagine what a dog thinks about all of our human instructions, and they just want to please us. T had the privilege and blessing of experiencing Scooby’s unconditional love. A true “best friend.”
Immediate tears when I read about the men in your life. You reminded me of the man in my life. I have seen the unabashed love he has for four-legged friends. I have seen the tears he sheds at the loss of his friend.
The actual video! Now a sob. Thank you for the reminder, of what is important in our life. A beautiful post!
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Thank you Erica for feeling what I felt when I wrote this post. Yes, I cry every time I see the video of T with Scooby. Love that never ends. ❤
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Another love story with a puppy… can’t imagine our lives without dogs! (Dog is God spelled backwards afterall) 😉❤
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Our lives would be just shadows, no light, without our pets.
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Reblogged this on By the Mighty Mumford and commented:
WORKS WITH CATS, TOO, FOR MEN!
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