“I didn’t see it coming,” I said to Thomas.
I didn’t know Thomas. Well, not well. I’d just met him 35 minutes ago when I entered the bar. Alone. For the first time in my 54 years of life.
“You didn’t see what coming?” Thomas asked. Continue reading
life
ONE with the Truth
It’s taken me 89 years, two months, and 26 days to figure it out.
But Lord help me, I have figured out what no one told me all these living days.
I don’t blame the people in my early life. My grandmother’s folk (she had 14 siblings) spent their lives just surviving. The earlier generations didn’t have time to figure out what was real, because life was just too damned hard.
But we technocratic, soft-skinned, thin-skinned spoiled people of the 21st century – we have no excuse. We have toilets and warm showers and grocery stores packed with food. We have vehicles of all sizes and shapes to transport us anywhere; free education from 5 to 18 years; easy chairs to sit in and stare into our gas fireplaces just to ponder. No need to chop our wood and cook our meat on that fire. We just use it to warm our souls and ponder. Yes, to just think.
Not that thinking helped me figure it out. The opposite, really. Continue reading
Fluffing My Aura
June is a happy month for my family. But it’s also a month that I need to fluff my aura a lot.
Until a few months ago, I never knew about the joy of fluffing. Sure, I’m a yoga-believer. I try to meditate once in a while, and during my long walks, I definitely find myself in a “different mind-space” at times.
But normally, I’m as stressed as the last (and first) person. Life, you know? It springs surprises and quirks, leaps and jerks, every day. Sometimes, I just want to hide under a good book and escape – but most times I’m unable to get away from the hustle/bustle of daily irritations, situations, and difficult deliberations.
Continue reading
The End
The end could be the beginning, or,
it could really damn well be the END.
A famous quote is needed here –like “to be or not to be.”
No Shakespeare am I, but I wonder if
“The end of never is the beginning of always”?
Books finish with The End. But is the story over?
Do the characters live on, at least in the reader’s mind?
In that case, the end is never-ending – infinite,
at least until the last reader is gone.
A week before my dad died, he declared,
“I’ve realized that when I die, it’s over.
Nothing is left but cold old bones.
I go nowhere, and nowhere is the end.”
I ignored him, hoping for some hope but
held his hand when he took his last breath.
Joyfully we both realized at the same time
That he was wrong.
In honor of National Poetry Month, and in the words of Rumi:
Never Give Up Chocolate
Pondering the things I wish I’d known.
What do you wish you’d known in your past, now that you’ve reached some type of maturity and can look back?
When I encourage my writing class students to write their list of “Things I Wish I’d Known,” I write along with them, thinking it’s an easy exercise.But I’m surprised by my first esoteric response:
“Never, ever give up chocolate.”
Embarrassed, but intent on following my own instructions of just writing out the first things that come to mind, I continue my list:
“Give to others, but be sure to also give to yourself.”
My grandson already knows some of the things I wish I’d known.
The following one surprises me:
“Don’t worry so much about hurting someone else’s feelings.”
Wait a minute. I catch a glimmer of something.
The next insightful “wish I’d known” advises:
“Those you love, love more; those you don’t like – avoid more.”
Ah, I’m connecting all the dots, or all the “wish I’d knowns,” to be more exact.
Never ever give up chocolate expresses all of the above platitudes, only better.
Never give up what I am, what I need, what is right for me.
Ever.
I’ve learned that yes, it’s important to keep others happy, to take care of them, to be a “good” mother,wife,daughter,friend,colleague,sister,aunt,grandmother,mom-in-law,sis-in-law,cousin.
But, I shouldn’t have to give up ME to be a good anything.
Not that I’d give up my mistakes and misdirections and missions lost. I needed each and every one of those experiences to get here – to a chocolate-loaded life of love, wonder, worry, pleasure, sadness, but mostly joy.
Particularly if I have a piece of saved (and hidden) dark chocolate buttercream nearby.
What’s on YOUR list of “things you wish you’d known”…?
P.S. I also wish I’d known that poetry can be fun, instructive, soul-searching, and beautiful. If you feel the same way about poems, my blogging friend Karen Elliott is featuring a Poetry Week February 18-23 – check it out at http://karenselliott.wordpress.com/ (one of my poems will be featured on Friday, 2/22).
roughwighting 