In My Dresser Drawer

/ roughwighting

https://www.pngwing.com/en/free-png-pjusv/downloadI’m a writer. And an author. A reluctantly published author. I’m disappointed with myself in that way. If I wasn’t reluctant to publish, I’d do it more. If I wasn’t reluctant to publish, I’d shout to the world that I love to write stores. If I wasn’t reluctant to publish, I’d share my stories far and wide.

Well, actually, I do share my stories from Vietnam to Germany, from Colorado to Vermont, from South Africa to England. On-line. On a blog. And doing so doesn’t cost me a penny. Well, it does cost me a few pennies, since I choose to pay the WordPress website so there are no ads in my blog.

But publishing is a whole other deal. It’s an expensive deal, it’s a time-consuming deal, and it’s an ordeal.

Why am I mulling all of this?  Cleaning out my guest room dresser, I find the 8 x 11 money/receipt book that I bought during an optimistic, idealistic time of selling lots of my paperback books. blogging, publishing, writing, in my dresser drawer

I’ll skip over the time it took to write my first romantic suspense, the excitement of acquiring an agent almost immediately, my disappointment in realizing that if my book was picked up by a mainstream publisher, I’d need to re-write it according to the publisher’s needs (more violence, more sex), I’d have to accept the cover they choose, and I’d make about $1 for every book sold at a bookstore. Maybe.

I’ll skip over the decision I made to publish my books myself. My way, with my cover and royalties going straight to me, not the 3rd line editor of a corporate entity.

I didn’t resent finding an independent editor nor designing my own cover nor spending weeks sending the manuscript to beta readers. I did mind the huge learning curve of trying to self-publish.

Doodle, Mike Allegra, Writing in Yoga Pose, blogging, publishing

Doodle courtesy of Mike Allegra.

The hours of anguish. The days of detailed derailment. But then, success, and the satisfaction was wholesome.

But the selling – the promotion – the feeling that I have to “hawk” my wares through talks at libraries and any bookstore that would have me, and group e-mails to friends and acquaintances. Renting a booth at venues and either using the awkward receipt book or that little square doohingy, which I fumbled with uncomfortably. Learning Venmo and Paypal and getting hacked.

My desire to write my novels diminished (3 unfinished in my file drawer).  I’m ashamed that I’m too much of a wuss to go once again for the bigger publishing picture – to put myself out there and publish to my heart’s desire.  

Well, here’s to a writer’s silent mantra – “maybe someday.”

blogging, publishing, my books, memoire, children's literature, romantic suspense

Filling up my dresser drawer.

All that said, I love the books I’ve published. Two romantic suspense novels through my own self-publishing venue (Near.Perfect.Press.), two children’s books, and a flash memoir through Borgo Publishing. The miracle? Readers still find and read my books, either through Amazon, Borgo, or through my contests.

Recently, fellow blogger and contest winner Pete Springer wrote a terrific review of my first published book Twin Desires. Hit the link here and enjoy the fun: Having Some Fun With Twin Desires.

Makes me think that maybe is soon.

163 thoughts on “In My Dresser Drawer”

  1. Am I first? I’m never first to comment here. Wheee!

    First of all, you should be so proud of your literary output. Braving the learning curve to own one’s rights and all the joy of marketing that follows–brava! My own journey mimics yours in many ways, including using that little square doohingy for sales. I blush to say that I’ve mislaid mine, but have my “hubsters” as a fall back. I did read Pete Springer’s brilliant review of Twin Desires.

    When you are ready, your readers will slurp up your next opus (or two), even if they took a while to see the light of day, incubated as wee babes in a guest room dresser drawer. Yay, Pam! 😀

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    • Wow! Have you ever thought of writing, Marian? 🤣 Just kidding. 😉 Your comments echo my thoughts 100%. Writers are an odd breed. We spend all this time nurturing a manuscript and giving it life, only to turn around and convince ourselves it’s not worth the time and effort it takes to put it out there. Yet, I’m still waiting to meet that person that says, “Writing, meh, I can take it or leave it, but this marketing stuff is what I live for.”

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      • What fun/funny insight you have Pete. I agree, I have never met a writer who jumps for joy about promoting. I love being part of this “odd breed” who prefer words to money, creativity to marketing. But, we gotta find a way to get our babies out there. You and Marian make so many good points.

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    • You’re first in my mind, Miraim, in so many ways – first to write a warm and touching memoir about your “plain” days and also to share so much of your life – past and present – in your blog. I really, really like the idea of our stories incubating. I can kind of hear their heartbeats in that file drawer. I love how much this post has awakened others as they incubate and debate the joys/woes of publishing.

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  2. And I can’t believe I’m the second to comment! You have done incredibly well. Think how many have never been brave enough to publish at all or stop at one. I had a boss who always said, “Timing has a life of its own. ” In other words, when the timing is right, it will happen. I’m sure you have many more books in you that will be published. I love the name of your self-publishing company. I am about to venture into this self-publishing world myself. Am I scared? You bet. But I’m determined to do it.

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    • Way to go, Darlene! I taught dozens of students I knew would do well in life because they had the extra determination it takes to get over the next hurdle. I’ve developed an analogy for writing/publishing. It’s like running a marathon (more accurately, what I imagine running a marathon is like since I’ve never done one), and there are many different paths to get to the finish line. We have to all choose our way and then run that race.

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    • I’m glad I put my fears/reservations about publishing “out here,” Darlene. I’m learning so much about other writers and how they also must run this marathon each their own way (using Pete’s analogy). I’m so impressed with all the Amanda books you’ve written that I thought you had this publishing thing down flat. Sorry, but it kind of helps knowing you’re exploring other options also. ❤

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      • I’ve learned that in this business you can never get comfortable. It’s a moving target and you need to be prepared to change your aim. I keep reminding myself that you are never too old to learn something new. It just might take longer.

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    • HI Darlene, I am interested that you are also venturing into self publishing. I have recently done the same. I am curious as to your reasons as I know what mine are. The Christmas Bird and my two Sir Choc Holidays and Highdays book have been my learning vehicles. I am planning on self publishing Lion Scream soon and that is what all this preparation has really been about.

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  3. I do understand your reluctance and I find your work to be excellent and Pete recognized that. happy to see you here as always and when and if you’re ready to jump in again, we’ll be there for you

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  4. Publishing (or submitting) anything is a big step–a leap of faith that something will come of it. Any I can imagine that self-publishing adds to it, along with all the publicity stuff.
    I suspect though that by writing this post, you are on your way to try it again, or soon will be.

    I don’t have one of those thingies, but there’s probably an app for it now. 🙂

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    • Haha. Yes, seems to be an app for everything now. You “read” me well, Merril. I suppose I was thinking out loud and sharing my fears/hesitations here with my blogosphere buddies. We all encourage each other so much. The other thing I’m thinking (and I’m thinking of your poetry) is that if we have a passion for our poems/stories/novels, then it’s worth the effort to get them out there and share.

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  5. Don’t be hesitant to publish with a big publishing house. It’s easy and less work than self publishing. I published a lot of my books with Random House and its imprints. It was easy and in the discussions with my editor we always found a better solution than my original one.
    I suppose as an author it’s deadly to think that’s my work and that’s me. Actually, we produce for a world wide market. We provide a service with the books, scripts etc. and our product should fulfil our readers needs. It’s not important if it is exactly what we wanted, in the end it is important that it sells or at least that it starts a discourse.
    These are my experiences as a professional author who worked as an editor as well.
    Keep well and happy
    Klausbernd
    The Fab Four of Cley
    🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

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    • I have next to no experience with this, but I do no one thing—much like education (my profession), there is no one size fits all in the publishing world either. I have talked to numerous people who have tried both traditional and self-publishing, and many prefer the self-publishing route. Most writers have to have incredible resiliency either way.

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      • I taught students at the McGill University who wanted to have their work published by a known publishing house. Most of them have self published some of their work. But being published by a known publisher was their dream. I understand that very well. As an author you want to be read and to be read by many. This is only possible with a known publisher. People saying that they are happy to self publish are 90% if not more unsuccessful authors, what means there are not enough readers wanting to read their work. Last not least, there is the money. F.e. I sold about 500.000 + of most of my titles worldwide, getting 10%- VAT, that is okay because all the secondary rights add to this sum. But selling 5000 copies and getting 90% is much less. I know hardly any author who sold more than 5000 self published books or he/she has to invest a lot.
        I think writing is like every job, if you want to be top you have to be resilient.

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    • Thanks, Frank. I was a little worried about posting something that’s a bit less cheery than my normal. But I always write with total honesty, so I wrote it as I felt it. Turns out so many of us writers/authors feel the same. But I like what Pete says in response to your comment. As readers, if we like the author, we’ll read their novels whether self-published, mainstream published, or through an Indie press. The writing/plot/description/characterization – that’s what matters. And in Pete’s post about my book Twin Desires, he even proves that genre doesn’t even matter – if a story catches our interest, then we readers will go for it!

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  8. Oh my dear friend. Your existing literary legacy is significant, and you deserve to be extremely proud of it. I am proud of YOU!

    Your honesty about sharing the angst and aggravation of publishing is greatly appreciated. It is a slog, no matter what publishing route you take.

    But there are lots of us who are really, really hoping you’ll keep writing…AND publishing!

    Liked by 6 people

    • SLOG is the perfect terminology, Elizabeth. Thanks so much for your encouragement. On another matter, I think of you as I write a letter every day (which will never be sent) to someone special – it’s therapeutic and beneficial. Thought you’d appreciate this other way to use letter writing.

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    • Thanks for the kudos to all of us who focus (great word) on our words to create our stories. Takes courage and resiliency. The comments on this post are helping me stick (and continue) with my writing program. 🙂

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  10. I applaud your book journeys! Publishing is a daunting path. I just finished writing my debut fiction novel and now begin the transition into the “book business” phase. The query letter is ready and it is SO scary to birth this work into the world and press “submit.”
    Keep writing and keep putting it out there- how lovely to have readers who validate your work!
    Happy Creating 😃

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    • Congrats, Tracy! You’ve now completed the “easy” part (and I say that with a smile and a shake of my head). Writing fiction – creating our characters and plot and setting – is a lot of hard work. But it’s fun, too, isn’t it? The journey ahead? Maybe not so much. But good luck with your query letter and searching for an agent. I really enjoyed reading your last post (which was from September) and encourage you to continue. Agents/editors/publishers like to see that an author has a website and followers.
      Lastly, you get a tribe here on the blogosphere, and we all will support you in your publishing efforts.

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  11. First of all you have all the right in the world to be proud of your accomplishments!! Even rhe manuscripts that lie unfinished. You still took the time to write fhem, you let your creative juices flow. Keep it up! You are an amazing writer.
    Yes! Self publishing is a lot of work!! The cost and the promoting are the two big factors that have me seeking the traditional route now. But that can be frustrating too. The market is swamped and so much competition.
    So whichever way you go I applaud you! Take courage, you can do this! ❤

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    • Having the heart to write and share those stories with the world takes courage, whichever route we choose. I suspect I’ll eventually end up self-publishing, too, because the rejection rate is daunting. Any writer should feel pride when getting to the finish line.

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      • I agree with you Pete. After all the hard and fun work of producing stories, it’s the challenge of getting to the finish line that completes what we do . For sure, whichever route is taken, it’s the best feeling in the world to have it in Readers hands. 🙂

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        • One of my favorite children’s writers, Kate DiCamillo, says that she collected 473 rejection letters over six years before striking a deal on her debut novel, Because of Winn Dixie. Now, there are publishers who must be kicking themselves for not signing her earlier. Talk about persistence, Carolyn. You go, girl!

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    • You write so many truths here. We should feel that pride in writing our stories/novels, whether they get “out there” or not. You are so right. And yes, strength and SELF-CONFIDENCE is needed. I love your posts and look forward to reading more from you, always. Best. xo

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  12. My least favorite part of being a published author is the promotion. It will suck the life out of the most highly energized writer. Honestly, I was much happier when I was writing for myself. You’ll know what’s best for you, Pam. In the meantime, I can enjoy Mollie and her friends that remain displayed on our coffee table. xo

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  13. Hi, Pam – The entire world of publishing (either self-publishing or traditional) totally does my head in. It has always seemed totally unfair that after all of the creativity, work and endless hours — an author is faced with more work and more endless hours just to get books into our hands. For this, I thank you and all great authors like you. Please keep publishing however works best for you — and I will keep reading and following! ❤

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    • Thank you for that, Donna. People who are not writers (who wish to share their work with the public) don’t understand that publishing is a lot different than it was two decades ago. But then again, many of us never would’ve had a chance at all to create and share. So I am grateful for that. Honestly, the writing part is a lot of fun and I don’t mind the work and endless hours. It’s the other stuff. 😰 But what makes us weep can make us stronger. 🤓

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  14. Hi Pam, I understand these feelings, I truly do and you have accomplished a great deal! When I helped my father write and publish his memoir and then a book of short fiction, we had so many enthusiastic goals and ideas for how to promote them. After he passed away, I was sure I was going to immerse myself into publicizing his books, but it is so much work to do it alone and I’m embarrassed to say I have done little to do that. Hence the boxes of copies in our basement. Maybe is a good word, though…🙂 Great post.

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  16. Writing is a lot of work. And for the longest time it was my dream. I started writing in my forties. Took courses, got published in literary journals. Had my first book published, a collection of short stories by a traditional press, in my fifties. Then nothing. There is a mem

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  17. Opps. Hit the button by mistake… there is a novel and a memoir on my computer and a scholar lot of rejection letters to go with them. By 61, I was restructured out of my day job and had time. To write. Or so I thought. But I was tired, my brain was not the same. And I realized that I did not want to put in all that work. I did not want to spend hours and hours at a computer, something that was affecting my health. Then I realized that it didn’t matter because the only person who would be disappointed if I never published again would be me and I would get over it. I took up kayaking.

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  19. What a great summary of the highs and lows of Indie authoring. Everyone considering this approach should read this so they aren’t starry-eyed about the money and the ability to Do It Their Way. Sharing everywhere!

    Pete’s review is excellent–saw it on his blog (I think). That guy can write and his book (Indie published) is proof.

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    • I’m smiling at your comment, Jacqui (although I’m late to responding, I read it a number of days ago and laughed). As a creative writing teacher, I’ve met so many students who have decided their book is going to sell thousands, nay, tens of thousands, and make them a lot of money. Worse, they haven’t started page one yet!!! ;-0

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  20. Since I’ve had the pleasure to read your published works of fun and adventures, I appreciate your publishing efforts! The spirit will move you, but not today, it’s too cold!

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  21. Thank you for being so open with us Pam. Clearly, many of us enjoy your writing and support your choices whatever they are. I faced similar reluctance to market my photography, and now only do it for fun. Kudos on having written many books and published several. I love your short stories!

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  22. Thank you for all of this, Pam. I appreciate your candor…these are conundrums I’m about to face about which way to go publishing-wise…and the more I speak with other authors the more the push to promote comes through as a burdensome, challenging task. So much to think about. Most of all – know that I appreciate your voice right here in the blogging world! 😘

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  23. I can relate to your dresser drawer, Pam. I have a couple of manuscripts lurking in my desk drawer. I’ve self published four books and I’m currently shopping an editor for my first completed novel. It is an expensive endeavor but certainly rewarding in the end (not monetarily speaking 🙂 )
    I will buy your novel that Pete has reviewed. I’ll look forward to the read!

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    • Aren’t all dresser drawers for half-written or yet-to-share-with-the-world manuscripts?😊 The fact that we haven’t thrown them out must say something. It reminds me of the Jim Carrey line from Dumb and Dumber: “So you’re saying there’s a chance?”

      I highly recommend Twin Desires, Lisa.

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    • Oh, I laughed out loud at your lurking manuscripts, Lisa, and thought I had responded earlier. Goodness, it does seem at times that these unfinished stories are lurking in the drawers, doesn’t it, whispering, “Come backkkkkk. Finish meeeeeee.” May we hear the whispering and answer the lurking calls. 🙂 P.S. – and I hope you enjoy my book. xo

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  24. I know these thoughts cross my mind to, Pam. This isn’t an easy calling, but it seems to be one that is very insistent too. I spent years sending out my first book. Got some nice rejections too. After a break, I went indie. Then came the learning. My only complaint now is the cost and having to promote myself. I know I will always write but in what form I never know. I did see that great review on Pete’s blog, and it reminded me I still needed to read it 🙂 Which I think comes around to how great and supportive this community of writers is. Xo

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    • Even though we’re told over and over again to expect rejections, each one still cuts to the heart. I have a writer friend who has worked YEARS (and yes, I mean a dozen) on her middle grade book. It’s good. Really good. But she’s only sent it out twice, and got rejected twice, so she’s ready to give up. NOOOOO! I tell her. There are so many ways to reach readers. Don’t give up on yourself and your characters. I’ve certainly enjoyed your stories, Denise. Mainstream publishers are less likely to give a chance to fantasy and fairies, to supernatural and “unique” stories. That’s why Indie publishing is such a great venue for readers to find us. xo

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  25. It was hard to not read every single comment here because your tribe is here and we are all rooting for you, no matter what decision you make. I have surrounded myself with writers in the hopes you all rub off on me. I must say, I have seen the work that goes into finding a publisher willing to publish your work (and all the changes they request of you) as well as the immense amount of work involved in self-publishing.
    I do appreciate those who take the time to use the skills of an editor because the only downside to self-publishing without means anyone can do it and there are so many books out there which, to me, are barely readable as they are so filled with grammatical errors and bad writing (even if the story is good). Definitely NOT your case or anyone in our circle.
    I dunno if I’ll ever have the courage to write something outside of the blogosphere so I commend you!

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    • I encourage you to take that leap of faith, Dale. I’ve only written one book (working on two more now), but it’s hard to describe the feeling of holding something you created in your hands. Not quite as amazing as holding your child, but still pretty fantastic.

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    • GREAT thoughts here, Dale (and sorry for the late response – “life” got in the way for awhile). Anyway, any “serious” writer who believes in their stories/novels will hire an editor and designer and use lots of beta readers before even considering self-publishing. The good thing about indie publishing/promoting/marketing being costly is that it should only encourage those who seriously want to reach readers and keep them. Also, the blogosphere has become a wonderful way to find good editors, cover designers, etc. I found Anneli Purchase (actually, she found me by reading my first book and emailing me about two typos she found. And she loved the book so much she offered to fix them – at no cost. She’s edited all of my books since then, and the novels of several other Indie authors, and is a fabulous resource.

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      • Don’t you worry on the “late”! Life is life and it does tend to like to get in the way.
        Yes, you do have a point – the costs themselves should be a deterrent for those not serious (though some have money they don’t know what to do with 😉 )
        I agree, we find many resources in the blogosphere and how wonderful Anneli Purchase found you! (takes notes….)

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  26. Thanks for sharing, Pam. I can totally relate. I’m currently questioning going through the stress of self-publishing my third book still in progress. There must be another way of sharing my stories, I tell myself. >By the way, I enjoyed your heartwarming, “extraordinary ordinary” stories in your book Flashes of Life. Congrats on the review of Twin Desires!

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  27. You’ve summed it up pretty well, Pam. I think many authors feel this way. I know I do. I love writing, but I’m terrible at blowing my own horn, so then I wonder why I’m bothering to go to the expense and trouble to write yet another book. Anyway, I admire what you’ve accomplished so far. Don’t stop!

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    • One of the reasons I am considering continuing my WIPs stuck in the dresser drawer is that I know of a great editor who will make sure my novel is perfect. (I just praised your craft, above, to Dale.) Yes, we creatives hate hate the marketing/promotion part, but since we have readers who enjoy our novels (and I LOVE your novels, Anneli) then I think we have a duty to continue writing them. 🙂

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      • Aw, thank you so much, Pam. You know I’m here for you if you want me when you get that novel done. I’ve been seriously thinking about getting started on that book I’ve had in my head for a long time now. Maybe I’ll get to it. Meanwhile, I’m so happy to hear that you liked my books. Happy Valentine’s Day.

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  30. YOU GOT AN AGENT RIGHT AWAY?!?! Envy envy envy envy envy
    Yeah, after a year of querying re my memoir, I finally decided to do it all myself. Well TBH, my son-in-law helped me get it onto Amazon’s Createspace (back in 2017).
    A book launch, library reading, two newspaper articles and mucho social-media blurbs later (featuring later books too), I think I can count sales on, well, several hands. OK, maybe a centipede’s legs. Sigh…

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  31. Dear Pam, as you know, I have been a fan of your writing and your perspective on life for quite a bit of time. It is a shame that an author has to turn into a salesperson in order to get their voice heard. But, I think you should take your wonderful sense of humor on the road and perhaps think of being “on the road” as another creative challenge. Anyway, that’s my 2 cents.

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  32. Do you hear us all shouting, Pam? Go for it! It’s clear that I’m one of many on your blog who see your talent and creativity. I wish I would have arrived at this point in my life sooner, but I must say that having a philosophy of “no regrets” feels pretty damn good.

    I sense we think the same way about this topic. It’s never been about trying to become rich and famous; it’s more about putting something out into the world we feel proud about creating. One associated benefit is perhaps we’ll inspire one of our children or grandchildren to chase their dreams.

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  33. You sound like me, Pam. Only I’m worse. My second novel, When in Vanuatu, was published by a hybrid publisher, She Writes Press. It came out in 2021, during the pandemic. I did a little bit of marketing and then I just drifted away from it. I, too, hated to “hawk my wares.” I doubt that I’ll publish another book. I sent a short story out and had it published in an online magazine. I didn’t get paid, but on the other hand, I didn’t have to promote it. Maybe I’ll do that again.

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  34. Pam, I think Flashes Of Life was as “real” as any book I’ve read in a long, long time, and by that I mean the warmth, sincerity, and openness just oozes out of those pages. Those everyday life experiences were ones readers could so easily identify with, even if it didn’t happen or happen quite that way in their own lives. You’re got a gift. And, each time you’ve gone through the process of publishing and marketing…what has not “killed” you has made you stronger. Look at it this way…you’re more prepared than ever for clearing any obstacles that might arise the next time out. Sounds like you’re working from a position of strength to me!😀

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  35. I admire anyone who can write a book and then get it published, no matter how it is published. I am a writer, but one who blogs and has never wanted to write a book. That’s a totally different kind of stress– and one that you’ve handled brilliantly. Carry on, Pam. I can hardly wait to see what you come up with next.

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  36. Awww, Pam. Your books are wonderful, and I hope you jump in with both feet and get your next project out to the world. You have an established fan base! And I’m one of them. Publishing is work. I know. There are parts that are exhausting and expensive, some within our control, others not so much. Huge thanks to Pete for lighting a spark under your, um, feet! Great review. You are talented and loved. Hugs.

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    • That is wise, Nancy. But with strong and constant polishing that silver can be bright and shiny again. 😏 Sorry, I can’t help it. As a writer I needed to use a metaphor. I think maybe I just need to polish up my manuscripts and go for it. 💜

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  39. I think you’ve done quite well with self-publishing, and you certainly are a talented writer! I know what you mean about the difficulty of actually selling your writing , though. I’ve avoided self-publishing for exactly that reason: I don’t want to have to give talks at libraries or try to sell my work myself. I admire your ability to do that so successfully!

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    • Many many thanks for your support and kind words, Ann. I have such a difficult time calling libraries and book clubs offering to read and talk about my books. I haven’t done it since the pandemic and I guess it’s almost time to start again. The weird thing is once I’m in front of the group of people I have such a good time sharing the love of writing and my stories. Some of the students in my writing classes have taken flight and used the more expensive Indie publishers who do it all for a cost. They think it’s worth every penny. Just a thought for you!

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    • Hi Ellen! I’m so proud that I got to hear the beginning of your book in my writing classes that you eventually publishing and it’s a fabulous book!So many talented writers never get to go to mainstream publishing but likely find a tribe within the Indie world.

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  41. HI Pam, I write for the pleasure of writing and I create art because I like doing it. I am happy if other people occasionally purchase and read my books and am thrilled if they enjoy them, but I would probably still write them even if only my mom ever read them.

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  42. I can kind of empathize here. I actually love the pre-publishing side of being an Indie, but I too hate marketing. The whole ‘look at me, look at me, look at ME!’ thing makes me cringe. If I didn’t love blogging so much, no one would ever know I had books at all.
    Plus…there is another side to the marketing issue as well. When I first started writing, I was writing for the love of it. After all, no one would see my stories except me.
    Now? There is a weight of expectation squashing each word into the ground. I’m trying to get back to that early sense of excitement, but I can only seem to manage it for short periods of time.
    I hope that we both get some of the joy of writing back.
    And getting a great review is an excellent step in the right direction. 🙂 Grats!

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    • I must admit that when I write my short short stories for my blog I don’t think about my readers. I just write them for the fun. Sometimes when I’ve written and share a post I cringe and think oh no, no one will like this. And then I’m happily surprised. Some of my friends who I didn’t know are followers will come up to me and say how much they liked a particular post. What a surprise! But then of course I wonder if that means they didn’t like any of the other posts! 😝 No, the writing I hesitate to continue is the parts of the stories and chapters that I want to publish into a book. That’s when my courage sinks, thinking of the entire publishing process ahead. All that said, thank goodness I “met” you through Diana Peach because I have loved your books.

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      • Oh gawd…I can so relate to all that second guessing! Trust me, the same thing happens on my blog. Sometimes I post things even though I ‘know’ they’re going to go down like a lead balloon. And then they don’t, like my post about AI and art. I honestly though no one would give two hoots. Instead, it’s become one of my most popular posts.
        Anyway, I hope you do find the courage to write long form again. -hugs-

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  43. Ah, isn’t it nice when a good review suddenly pops up for something you wrote a while back. I was never going to head down the road of traditional publishing and am, like you Pam, happy to have published on my own terms. And if my stuff sells then good, if it doesn’t, good as well. You’ve certainly been constant in your excellent blogging over a long period and I’ve seen many come and go.

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    • Same to you Roy. I have enjoyed every book you have written. Those of us who self-publish support each other and our good writing. So many readers miss so much if they only read books from mainstream publishers. Cheers to our writing and blogging!

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  44. This is such an honest post about being a writer and publishing. It is one thing to write and another thing altogether to publish. And it can be so daunting to publish, be it with a mainstream publisher or self publishing. You have written much and published a fair bit too, Pam. You should be very proud of yourself. Like you I have writing and manuscript tucked away somewhere and not sure if they will see the light of day. But who knows, maybe one day I will go back to them. Wishing you well for your writing and may you publish again when the time feels right 🙂

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  45. Well, this was timely. I am smack in the middle of TRYING to self publish and it is grueling and just plain NO FUN. I’d rather spend the time writing. Hence, my blog. 😦
    I think I’ll buy/read one of your books and make that worth your while! If I EVER get anything published I’ll let you know. Sigh. Until then ~ keeping the faith.

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  46. I know where you are coming from as I’ve reached the same point. I have found the marketing of my books so frustrating. My dear husband has said’ just focus on the writing and forget about the other. So that’s what I’m doing.

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  47. Pam, first congratulations on Pete’s superb and enthralling review of Twin Desires – a resounding endorsement of your book! Although I’ve read some of your other work I realised not this one, so this was a gentle nudge to me!😀

    Your reflective post is one that captures so many of our experiences with publishing. The writing part is a hoot (mostly) and the self-publishing is not too bad (especially with some help!) but the promotion is tough! The few talks I gave before Covid went brilliantly and I enjoyed myself thoroughly but before the events I was terrified! I am in awe that you have done so much work on the ground. Sharing books here online is an incredible way to move forward, make friends and enjoy everything about books. I hope your unfinished 3 novels will find their way out of the drawer, that ‘someday’ become that ‘soon’ and then join your other five wonderful and amazing books! You have many keen readers galore to eager to read them. With much love, my dear friend! xx ❤️

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    • I hope you know that you were talking to yourself as well here, Annika. We all are waiting for YOUR next book. I really like the way everyone is expressing their feelings here about publishing and promoting. Maybe, realizing that we’re all in same boat, so to speak, the waters will be less choppy as we continue our WIP. May it be so! 🙂

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  49. Self promotion is very hard for many writers. I’d be awful at it. But you have great stories and I’ve loved everything you have written. I have to find you in my reader again. WP?? Publishing is not nearly as much fun as the writing but someone as good as you are with a plot twist has an obligation to keep those stories coming just so I can read them. 🙂 I’m going to try and catch up now.

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      • Yes, I did follow you again so I’m going to start going into my reader to find what I’ve missed. Getting sick twice since October really threw me a curve ball. Just now catching up. I’ll be doing more of that this week. I think I have 2000 unread emails that need clearing out. It’s crazy how quickly we can fall behind. I will be there shortly. Hugs.

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  51. Pam, this was wonderful. You spilled out onto the table every (well, that’s my word) writer’s ups and downs, fears and worries. I think you’ve done really well! I don’t think I could do the self-promotion piece. But, one thing we love and have in common is writing on our blog. You are right on that. I really loved Pete’s blog post on your book. He’s the best!

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  52. Congratulatios on taking the publishing plunge! I know you mentioned being reluctant. But you’re out there and readers will get the opportunity to love your book. And congrats on this being your tenth year of blogging.

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    • Thank you so much! I just received a text from a friend who’s never read my books and she was finishing Twins Desires and told me “I LOVED IT!” So, yes, our books are being read, and yes, it’s worth it all the hassle. 🙂

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  53. I’m late, I’m late, for a very important….whatever! I found you at last, and that’s all that matters. Your blog came into my in box for years and then I lost you! I’ll make sure I catch you next time you post!

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